Again

Once again we’re here
back to where we were
maybe I’m wrong
I hope I am
hope I’m seeing wrong again
back and then it all goes black
drunk on what never comes back
a memory of what once was
a terrible tale of truth undone
once again we’re here
back to where it all began
death is such a familiar friend
when everything goes black again

Down the steps

What’s it worth to you
a little how do you do
more smile with less tooth
the truth is bluer than blue
an image in the snow
written yellow in white coal
the moan it’s so damn old
a recording warped and scored
what’s it worth to you right now
can you pay for it somehow
pull the pocket lint right out
smile big and large and wide
take the picture from the right
the side we never hide
the one done up so nice
come alive and dream forever
what it’s worth to you you’ll see
something so cold you can’t believe
drink the drowning kiss from skin
amused by what it was worth back then

If you knew him

If you knew the devil
oh yes your heart be still
for if you knew the devil
you’d be lost in all the thrills
the logic that’s unmoving
the heart that’s all but cruel
if you knew the devil
you’d make excuses until
just as with that ex lover
you keep rewriting truth
when you know the devil
he’s worth every excuse
so don’t pretend your sheets
are all that pretty white
we know you sleep in grey
in the best moonlight

Kind of life

Plead with me
drink my bones
take the feed
bring the flood
drown before you know tomorrow
let go of all that real sorrow
drown in liquor and in lies
the kind you tell yourself at night
alone in covers made of glass
plead with me
and drop the act
drink my bones and drown forever
in the misery I take pleasure
plead with me
and know my name
take the drink and drown in time
you’ll never know this kind of life

Yesterday’s sin

I paid a price
I wasn’t right
took the wrong road home tonight
can’t find my bed
I’ve lost my head
drunk off what might have been
I paid the price for lies I’ve told
sold myself and lost it all
drowned in what had never been
a bleak tomorrow
yesterday’s sin

Motels

Run away from the light
hide your eyes in the dark
and wake from the sun
without a cause
drink the river’s moonlight
shine so dim but so bright
and find the blood
upon your hands is gone
run away from the light
as you can’t see it coming
worry tomorrow
you’re worried about nothing
and everything comes
as the forest closes in
run away from sunlight
let the truth finally check-in

Wrong and dirty

I did you wrong and dirty
played the victim very well
abused the aftermath
and made your world a living hell
but it was all to serve a purpose
selfish as it was
I needed to feel something
living life was just no fun
so I created drama
let myself go quite insane
I remember screaming
that you’d rue the day
you took your love away
left me with a broken heart
and all those other lies
as the truth of all this bullshit
is I was doing just fine
I did you wrong and dirty
played the part so naturally
it was all to serve a purpose
to selfishly let free
all the kept up emotions
regarding the life you’d never see

Mute

Let’s come out and say it
the abuse is a lie
she isn’t crying
she’s laughing inside
we know the victims
and even when we don’t
why believe everyone
this world is a joke
pointing a whole hand
screaming in the dark
let’s come out and say it
we know it when we hear
the world can keep a timeline
the world can know a year
not everyone’s a liar
not everyone tells the truth
that’s why facts are important
and feelings often mute

Normal

Didn’t know truth
didn’t know what’s real
didn’t even know if
I could even feel
numb to the pain yes
numb to the screams
I wanted to die but
never knew the need
didn’t know the truth
didn’t know what real was
didn’t know in my youth
what was normal because
I didn’t know the truth
about being human
no one ever told me
I was just left musing
a child being lied to
and making things up
just to make sense of it
normals enough

A little

I went ahead and I died a little
got dressed and cried a little
let it go and set fire to it
burnt it down got rid of it
I went ahead and I died a little
cried and drove until I felt a little
but nothing ever fits the middle
all I do is walk that line
thought I was living but life’s a lie
went ahead and died
came back fine and I cried a little