Danger sitting

Danger sitting in the bed
with a grown woman who’s said
I’m a girl in one way or another
this chick ain’t bad just immature
won’t grown up its kinda absurd
act in charge like they work so hard
crying like a child
when they get paid large
don’t know how to act
so they blame men
danger is sitting in bed with them
little girls couldn’t be so damn grown
twenty fucking something years old
danger is letting women be girls
you’ve already grown up
but this time is yours
just so you know it’s silly at best
make your own life
or you’re just making a mess
danger is sitting in bed with women
grown ass adults pretending to be children
this is what we’re left with
this is what we’re given

Why do your children scream

Why do your children scream
cry until they can’t breathe
scream for you too see
to see that they are in need
why do your children want
want what you do not
want more than you give
why do you let them scream
cry and not satisfy their needs
why do I hear such things
screaming and crying
mommy please
they wail and wail all day
what are you doing anyway?
Why do your children scream
cry until they can’t breath
they’re screaming for you to see
as children they have needs
you made them so you’re responsible
they exist and you are the one they call
they scream and cry and beg for you
but you’re too tired to care, aren’t you?
Why did you have them
if you didn’t care
if you weren’t going to manage
their needs and their cares
why did you have them
just so they’d scream
tell all the neighbors how little they mean
why do your children scream
they cry and cry until they can’t breathe
why do your children cry
you ignore them and have all their life

Forever awed

Didn’t care until I was gone
thought I’d be with you all along
like a dog without a say
like you’d just keep getting paid
didn’t care that I could’ve died
you just smiled that smile of lies
like you really gave a damn
thought you had me throat in hand
didn’t care until I walked away
thought you’d always have the right away
like I’d pay your bills straight from the grave
but you took too much and I left the bank
didn’t care until I was gone
thought I’d never turn it off
like I hadn’t once before
you thought me weak again for sure
didn’t care because I let you in
but now the house is all but burnt
you thought I would stay but I’ve learnt
it’s gone and everything’s empty
you try hard but never forget me
now I’m gone and you wish I wasn’t
but I ain’t here to pay off a little or nothing
for the debt you built so very high up
your pain my very new triumph
thought I’d stay out of obligation
but now my responsibilities ain’t weighted
didn’t care that I could’ve died
now I’m gone and you asking why
shut the door the banks all closed up
got nothing for the beggars and locusts
didn’t care until I was gone
so now you miss me forever in awe

Survival instinct

I don’t want to mention
the evil in intentions
when you giving you yourself to play
who sold you a false sense of dignity
a monster who has yet ever had to pay
for crimes they commit and admit today
for a piece of every person
only wants to excuse
every single bad behavior
that resulted in abuse
for drugging and then robbing
men who you lied to
so you asked them if they wanted it
took it like survival
but you ain’t no Mike Tyson
you just living without trial
admit it like Polanski
and act like its okay
don’t matter what your reasons
your intent was to drug’em and get paid.

We in this

We in a mess again
got too many
fucking compliments-
it’s ridiculous
how the hell we live
in this shiny
messed up world
of bliss
we all so fucking special
we know too much-
it’s hell though
to be so smart and able
but know nothing
in spades so
we all confused and angry
so frustrated and hating,
jealous of our best friends
hate our children and then
forget what responsibility
and real is
the truth a product of crazy
we all delusional,
that shits hazy
our eyes are fogged
but we’re lazy
in a mess again
this shiny world of bliss
we forget who we is
and fall again and again

Running

They don’t come running
no they don’t bring you home
they don’t care
no they don’t care where you go
they won’t come running
though you dream they would
that they’d be there for
only if they could
but you know better
know more than they
they don’t come running
they don’t come your way
they won’t bring you home
or call out your name
thought that they’d care
but that’s not the case
they don’t come running
at least not for you
no you know them better
than you use to
and so you just know that
they aren’t coming
so you save yourself
there’s no real use in running.

Empty apartment

She talked of many things
her heart was filled with love
and everybody loves this girl
loved her ever so much,
but no one could see behind
the lips that formed a smile
never looked her in the eyes
the eyes that held this child
every bit of darkness
she left out for display
she talked about many things
things you never heard her say
her heart was filled with sadness
she tried to cure it with love
never felt the return
even though
she heard it all the time
and when she said goodbye
you missed her you even cried
thought she might be dead
but didn’t care enough.

Inside Lovato and the bad life coach

I am an artist,
an entrepreneur-
I’m creative
a fucking gift to the world.
I got ideas
and I show my tits on stage.
I feign authenticity
but make excuses out of pain.
I use my illness
and my addictions as a shield.
I use sobriety
as a theme to get a meal-
I am an artist
a philanthropist and more
I’ve got bipolar
and I wield it like a sword.
I’m not recovered
as that takes time and room to heal,
I am just a child
who doesn’t know what it means
to be real.
I’m just a celebrity,
adding titles to my name-
buying indulgences in vain,
and pretending mental illness is a game.
I am an artist
but that’s just an excuse
for being a child, for being rude
for being ill and relapsing too
I’m just too young to accept the truth,
it’s still my fault, but it’s also youth.

It bears repeating

When they come
you know they will
break their bones
and cut their heels
wound them ever
mortality
break their souls
and feed their needs
everything will be alright
whatever you choose
it will go on by
if you live-only if you survive
you just have to live
with that fight or flight
reap what you sow
it bears repeating
the only thing you’re owed-
your choices fleeting

Money can’t buy love

When you die alone
in a hotel bed
no one ever thinks
you will wake up dead
no one ever watches
the men who keep them safe
no one is responsible
for the life they did not save.
Everyone makes choices
just like Anthony Bourdian,
chose to die alone
a single flower on his grave-
choices made by others
to ignore the ones they love
everything has happened
because of what was never done
you say that you loved him
at least you loved someone.