So sweet

Everybody wants to be me but me
I don’t really want to exist and bleed
but everybody looking like I’m so sweet
got my own style and a warrior feel
everybody acting like I’m so cool
gotta be living like this girl would
all dressed up looking to kill
I’ve lost myself now looking for thrills
everybody wants to be me but me
thinking I’m bad but believe I’m weak
everybody wants to be the girl in black
hanging out in the bar no flats
wearing that red burning lipstick
not giving two thoughts about this new shit
everybody wants to be me but me
I want to die but they don’t see it
everybody thinking I’m the realest
but being real makes me feeling useless
everybody wants what they see
make me in to something unique
something that lives to breathe
when all I want is death so sweet.

The script

Do you see what I see?
Can you read the script?
Do you know what’s coming up
when you’re done with it
or do you just keep living life
repeating what you did-
is it all that matters
or nothing quite at all?
Can I still be in it
when it’s said and done
or have I been rewritten-
another story gone?
Do you see what I see?
Or is it all made up?
Do I live my life here
or did I hit the hard restart.

Comfort in the mirror

The comfort in the mirror
the picture comes no clearer
the writing is still hidden on the wall
nothing making sense this time you fall
crying while you’re laughing
singing but not dancing
the comfort that you feed is dying
everything is starving
the comfort in the mirror is lying
an illusion of a face you do not see
the picture all but blurred to black
the life that’s taken won’t come back

To use

I’m a mirror for you to paint
can no longer see me
I’m useless
there’s a story you want to see
a play to act in
the player is me
there’s something you think I am
broken mirror painted mad
I’m the puppet you hold the strings
I dance for you and you believe
the picture you paint is just me
you treat me as what you see
I’m a mirror broken from paint
the layers they’re heavy
they crack and they burn
I’m useless so paint me to use

Pretty lame

I’ve been pathetic
been down right rude
I’m somebody’s broken heart
bet you are too
been the crazy ex girlfriend
and the girl you didn’t label
been everybody’s friend
wound up alone later
I’ve been desperate
and a tool
made mistakes
and really bad choices
everybody’s stories
not exactly the same
but if you think you were cool
you were probably pretty lame

While it’s well

Take a step back
see where you at
move, move, move like the plague
everybody wants to be
fun, so wild and so free
everybody wants to be blameless
but we don’t know exactly how to
take it
see where you are bleeding
bandage up that heart
take a moment from me
pretend it isn’t art
and bleed out of the eyes
like a vision caught in hell
take a step back honey
and kill it while it’s well

But she said

She said you’re a bad guy
you don’t let me out at night
you tell me what to do
even though I asked you to
she says she’s really my friend
she don’t really like you man
she says you’re too controlling
that you want me to do your laundry
though you do mine instead
she says you’re not good in bed
but how would she ever know
she’s lying to me so we don’t wed
why are women so different
they don’t hold you down so much
unless they got what they want
they don’t really act so good
not that loyal like you wish they could
and she says you’re a bad man
that I’m too deep to understand
but I don’t know you’re still my plan
and she don’t talk to me anymore
she says I turned into a whore
all our other friends say
I gave her up so I could get laid
now they are gone and single
I made new friends and mingle
with a bunch of successful women
no little girls those games is wicked
we all found our pairs
no matter who they are
these games are fair
she said I should leave you
but now I know the real truth
she was so lonely and scared
she wanted someone else to be right there
misery loves company
it’s why having girlfriends is new to me
they get a bit vicious sometimes
so I found new friends that get my life
she said she hates me now
but I’m not in that crowd
I found new friends who say
they love me no matter my date
they love me cause I knew to stay
that they love me at the end of each day

Burning roses

I’m burning roses now
and I ain’t coming down
got no dollar bills
but I’m floating proud
people be looking at me
like I’m so damn lost
but these dreams are happening
no matter the cost
I got my own pen in my hand now
and a voice that I’m using
gonna make my own way
and I’m never pursuing
the past that undid me
when I was living my life
everybody was saying
I was doing it right
had everything wrapped up
in a nice little bow
all my fucking chaos
yeah that shit explode
I can’t do nine to five now
my degree don’t mean nothing
I’m living the life now
that makes me feel something
I’m burning the garden
and feeling so good
you thought that you controlled me
I think you misunderstood
you never did see me
but you took all I had
left me with bad credit
and no fucking cash
had a nervous breakdown
but now I’m not even sad
I’m writing the next chapter
I’m changing the story
you took all I had even the glory
so now I’m crawling upwards
from this dirty floor
everybody might be talking mess
but I’m aiming to soar

Blood heirs

Take what you will
take what you can
before you discover
who I really am
before you see me
me as a threat
before you are begging
begging to forget
take what you will
take what you want
drop all the context
say what you got
are you looking
for a new shot
a way to make bullets
drip from my heart
take what you will
take what you want
before you discover
the wars I have fought
you don’t belong here
here where we stand
standing as family
you rip from my hand
take what you will
it’s all that I am
speak with context
say what you want
tell the whole world
its you they should want

I don’t wanna hate you

I don’t wanna hate you
but I think I do
I think I hate you more
than I’m allowed too
I could boil water
or cook a fucking egg
I’m so goddamn heated
I’m melting time and space
can’t put it in perspective
can’t put it in its place
I don’t wanna hate you
but in the end I do
I hate you more than ever
ever thought I’d have too
I don’t wanna bleed this way
I don’t want to feel
feel as though I’m drunk off rage
too high to even heal
but after all the shit you did
I’m higher than a cloud
burning like the sun
I don’t think there’s a way out
didn’t want to hate you
but I guess it’s clear I do
can’t put it in perspective
but I understand the mood