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She said she loved me
right before she walked away
like I was ten feet in the grave
but thought I’d be okay
she said I meant the world to her
thought she was an honest girl
but the world meant very little
very little or so it would seem
she said she loved me
then walked away without me
holding onto lust abounding
all those thoughts consume so loudly
she wanted him this time so proudly
walked away this time without me
said she loved me but I doubt it
just another one she counted

Deepest regrets

Deepest regrets my darling
so sorry I couldn’t stay
so much time has been passing
so much you had to say
deepest regrets my lovely
you just missed my call
I think I’ve had enough though
of apologies gone wrong
so I think I’ll be walking
keep on moving far away
I don’t really care my darling
what you’ve got left to say
this is not real important
at least not to me
no longer the one you call for
deepest regrets honey

Stay

I thought I could run from you
thought I could hide
like I’d be wrong again
though I know when I’m right
that all my focused judgements
in the end are all lies
I thought I could run from you
but I got trapped in the light
the warmth of your hands
and the taste of your lips
never thought it could feel like this
like I could feel home and free all the same
I thought I could run run to the pain
get caught for a moment
kiss you in the rain
but I was so wrong dear
can’t run away
I thought I could run
but you wouldn’t chase
you knew all along that I wanted to stay

Put it in the box

She cut me down once again
guess she’s still not over it
thought I’d be coming back around
thinking I’d be lost without her now
begging for that pink coin purse
asking for her to prove my worth
tell me that it wasn’t a lie
that you said yes not out of spite
not to hurt someone you really loved
but in the end you weren’t having fun
fate came in and took his head
you fell down true love now dead
broke my heart yes once again
she cuts me down like I’m the bad guy
she said yes then took my eyesight
put it in a box and cut me out
drew a circle so I can’t doubt
you used my love to hurt another
now he’s dead and your still not over
the thing we had that wasn’t real
you really thought I’d still play lover
pine after you like you could feel
put it in a box cause your not done yet
you think I’ll be coming back
I don’t think I like the act
but I’m the bad guy you still pine for
I’m the one you can’t get back
put it in a box like you moved on dear
a circle in the sky says you’re still wet

The bad joke

I’m just a joke baby
a thing you make to breathe
the kind of girl you dreamed up last night
I know what I am
yes I know what you planned
the night you bought me for cheap
they would have given me for free
it’s just another night in your cold arms
this kind of love is doing me harm
I’m tangled in your web
you got my soul
my head
you got the life I breathe
you know I mean something
but only to you
only to you do I have value
I’d killed myself if I knew how to bleed
I don’t think you really understand me
I know what I am
and I know what you planned
and I disagree
you don’t got what I need
you thought you’d hold me up
keep me in your cuffs
drinking from your cup
like I love this stuff
oh baby you don’t know me
but you will see
I’m gonna burn it all
gonna make you fall
it’s just another cold night
you can hold me real tight
and when I say goodbye
you’ll know you won’t wake again

Break my heart

You sing just like a siren
calling out to him
you want to see me broken
because he chose me instead
you sing about his past
like you might be his future
like once he wounds to kill me
he’ll invite you out to dinner
you sing to him so sweetly
remind him I’m not you
but when he calls me a keeper
you know you know the truth
like everything he did
he did it yes to you
you are not the keeping kind
no you’re the one to leave
sorry that it wasn’t you
he gave the wedding ring
you sing about my heartbreak
like I didn’t win
I’m the one who got him
too forget the sin he lived
you sing just like a siren
but he’s not gonna drown
I’m the keeping kind dear
you’re just the one to lay it down

The other side

And I said enough is enough of the games that you play
can’t keep running on this path that you laid
all the stones here are jagged my feet have been flayed
and then you start to cry like I’m the one to blame
I know that I lied I know I did you wrong
but then you come right back you’re begging me to call
you tell me that you love me and you beg me just to stay
I tell you that you’re falling and that I should stay away
but then you start to text me keep on praying I’m okay
and still everybody’s thinking I’m the bad guy all the same
don’t know how many times you’ve told I’m the one that got away
every time we dance it’s like a perfect melody
and just at the right time it breaks down for the world to see
you will make another attempt to end this tragedy
say that I’m the monster put out all my dirty clothes
you say that I’m the wrong one but you text me just to post
and when I said goodbye to you you went away to cry
bleeding me with memories of what you give at night

Enough

Wedding bells are ringing
and we are all alone
no one comes to witness
the falling of the snow
we have been abandoned
don’t know what we’ve done
wedding bells are ringing
and no one’s here to hear
as all my joy spills over
all our love forever untouched
we are all alone here
but just you is enough

Lead with the lie

Tell me to love you
tell me to bleed it
lead with the lie
emptiness you breed it
clinging to nothing
save and empty dream
of what you think should happen
how you think it ought to be
and you tell me to love you
tonight like it’s the last
it’s like being told you’d die for me
but I haven’t even asked
tell me to bleed it
like I’m the one to blame
for believing the words
you no longer say
lead with the lie
do you know who’s speaking now
of what you think
of what makes sound
emptiness it’s something you breed
just for me
like a garden of dead flowers
we no longer breathe
the breeding of the death
kept withered by time
tell me to love you
I tell you to lie
bury the lead
with the words you don’t say
everything is broken
lost to decay
and you tell me to love you
tell me to bleed
lust in the veins
though you no longer need it
like whispers of something
you don’t want to hear
I tell you to lie
while I say I love you dear

The Christmas story

Call me up at Christmas
let me know I’m loved
by texting something simple
the same sentiment to everyone
burn me up with notice
invite me quick with glee
forget that it’s my birthday
forget once again about me
call me up at Christmas
to make yourself feel good
forget that I exist
unless you want me too
call me up at Christmas
I’ll answer with good cheer
but when it comes to News Years
I’ll drink to my own health
call me up at Christmas
so you feel good about yourself