Future desires

I find myself still wanting
still fearing in the night
so scared of what tomorrow brings
drunken off this fright
my soul feels everlasting
though I might die tonight
I find myself always wanting
always dreaming of this plight
the fight for immortality
for living past my death
to know what will become of me
when I finally lay to rest

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Dry floor

Trying not to breathe
be anything but me
break down
and break some more
keep writhing on the floor
fall down don’t try again
keep bathing in dead skin
keep drinking from that well
keep drowning in the sun
baked by light and air so fun
trying not to breathe
lungs try desperately
be anything but me
dead if it has to be
break down and then again
writhing in this sin
drinking all that’s come before
drowning on dry floor

Fight

Fight, fight back against the night
shutting eyes and thinking lies
somehow save the plight
don’t believe, don’t just run away
and cry
don’t drop to knees
unless your praying for the truth
fight, fight against the darkness
as it keeps you in the youth
the fear of growing older
from your parents now to you
fight against the thoughts
that nothing will get better
if you take up arms
we can end the terror
if every night you hide
cry yourself to sleep
another fight you lost
the dreams you cannot seek
fight, fight against the night
fight against the lies
fight for the real truth
hidden in disguise
fight, fight, fight and stay alive
listen to the truth not
just the feelings from inside
listen to the past and be mindful
of the truth
remember we aren’t special
the circle always moves

Crumbles

It all comes crumbling down
tick the clocks and run right now
burn the pictures trash the house
tear the curtains break the mirrors
we are dying breaking fear
it all comes down crumbling so
the world we’ve lost, lost all we know
broken pictures broken dreams
we got lost in all our screams
tick the clocks and tock the time
we all crumble before we die

Ashes

Burning all the flower fields
cut the weeds and keep the hills
ashes are such lovely things
the cinder looks like heart’s yearnings
everything burnt and black
char the world so it won’t come back
all the flames will die real soon
as the air gets eaten too
cut the weeds but keep the ground
look at all we can do without
burn the flowers and dry the lakes
the oceans gone the world replaced
drink the ashes take them in
the darkest remnants of what has been

Walk on fire

Burning brilliance
the bush on fire
the voice that booms
destroys my ire
broken dreams
unheard screams
the child dies
the mother feeds
burning darkness
blinding light
eyes go inward
close up tight
burn the skin
from bones of white
drink the marrow
and start to drive
drive through fire
burning roses
no one cries here
we’re all fine
burning bushes
brilliance
the time it’s taken
off the witch
burning bushes
blinding light
the booming voice
brings sight to life

Middle of the night

Lies can make you happy
in the middle of the night
sing a pretty song
make the world a new delight
and cherish what’s not happened
forgetting that you cried
the lies will keep you warm
in the middle of the night
lies can make you happy
burn a fire keep you warm
lies can soothe the heartache
keep you from growing sore
no bitterness to swallow
no absence of the warmth
lies can keep you going
when all you want is to die
yes lies can change a lot of things
like temperature and pain
make the coldest of the midnight’s
feel like summer in the day
lies can do a lot of things
but in the end they’re lies
so careful what you tell yourself
to get you through the night

Burning roses

I’m burning roses now
and I ain’t coming down
got no dollar bills
but I’m floating proud
people be looking at me
like I’m so damn lost
but these dreams are happening
no matter the cost
I got my own pen in my hand now
and a voice that I’m using
gonna make my own way
and I’m never pursuing
the past that undid me
when I was living my life
everybody was saying
I was doing it right
had everything wrapped up
in a nice little bow
all my fucking chaos
yeah that shit explode
I can’t do nine to five now
my degree don’t mean nothing
I’m living the life now
that makes me feel something
I’m burning the garden
and feeling so good
you thought that you controlled me
I think you misunderstood
you never did see me
but you took all I had
left me with bad credit
and no fucking cash
had a nervous breakdown
but now I’m not even sad
I’m writing the next chapter
I’m changing the story
you took all I had even the glory
so now I’m crawling upwards
from this dirty floor
everybody might be talking mess
but I’m aiming to soar

What the forest takes

Walking through the forest
it’s after midnight now
the darkness consumes everything
the sky contains no clouds
everything is silent here
the forest makes no sound
walking between the trees
nothing to be found
I’ve forgotten why I came here
forgotten who I am
walking after midnight
silent laughing drives me mad
don’t know what I look like
forgotten who I am
walking after midnight
no flesh at my command
a soul just drifting in darkness
drifting to final rest
never go walking after midnight
the forest needs no breath

I have some

I have some doubts
well maybe a lot
more than a few
these doubts that I’ve got
I cannot believe
very much in myself
I’ve lived in this flesh
I know what it’s about
I have my doubts
that I can maintain
some days I feel
like starting again
I have some doubts
most of them of self
tearing myself rightfully down
I’ve got some problems
I think I may
over think thinking
and minor decay
I find myself doubting my odds
finding myself
most personally scarred
living with doubts it’s rather hard
but I keep on going
keep running this life
I’m finding myself
doubting my right