Leave the light on

They leave the light on
cannot tell you what they think
they cry for hours
even when they’re fast asleep
they never tire
they never grow quite used to this
they leave the light on
but they’re always stuck inside the abyss
the darkness consumes
eats them up before it’s over
they leave the light
hope they’ll see it over their shoulder
but it’s black here
the darkness all but overwhelming
they leave the light on
it’s always there for the taking

Most creatures

Most creatures are afraid of me
won’t take the time to see
won’t heed my many warnings
or take what I don’t need
they gather with their torches
so awed and so afraid
so many creatures haunt me
the fear that they display
most creatures cannot stand me
oh they do not like the sight
instead they’d rather burn me
pretend to come at night

Courage is an art

I am not afraid
alone and in the dark
I’ve become a slave
yes courage is an art
pulls me into arms
makes my skin quite hard
and tells me to move forward
even in the dark
cannot see but still I’m moving
cannot hear but will not scream
I am not afraid
I’ll make this nightmare into a dream
turn the shadows twisting
away from my faint heart
die before it’s over
yes courage is an art

Doves and blue birds

Birds open a window pane
words that kill before they maime
wonderful we thought at once
broken down no time to trust
in the meadows blue birds call
falling from the trees they’re gone
birds that fly and flee astray
lost upon a window pane
heard the voices
heard the doves
I don’t love it it’s not enough
words that silence all of us
birds they flutter than they fly
don’t know how to sleep tonight

A child’s monologue

Stop stop stop
get the fuck off me
get the fuck away
I don’t want to play
you’re the fucking adult anyway
why am I screaming
why am I crying
feeling terror building
ever building inside me
stop the fucking torture
end the fucking game
I’ve already cried out I don’t want to play
stop fucking touching me
get the fuck away
why are you so close to my fucking face
I feel so small now
can’t feel my ears
stop fucking screaming
I’m drowning over here
stop the fucking game I don’t know the rules
you’re the adult here
and I don’t understand
why the fuck are you laughing
while I’m terrified and sad

Refusing to relive it

She says it’s trauma
that her panic’s getting bad
like everybody’s placing bets
on how long she can last
while laying in the sun
the sand beneath her skin
she says that it’s trauma
that’s where it all begins
all the loose behaviors
all the fear she lives
it all started with a trauma
that she refuses to relive
she says that people talk
they talk about her life
how all the things she does
it’s just not fucking right
she says that it’s the trauma
the pain from long ago
she says she’s given up
on ever letting go
she says that it’s just trauma
that’s the way it really is
you never can get past it
so it’s better to just live
she says that it’s the trauma
driving everyone away
she refuses to relive it
so no one knows it’s name
she blames the whole damn family
because they do not know
she says her panic’s worse now

At the end

I’m the one you thought of
in your last bad dream
the monster in your closet
the one that you can’t see
you feel me on your lips
and feel me in your skin
the flesh that burns so hollow
let my games begin
I’m the one you thought of
when the fear did come
it burned you to your core
and now my job is done
you won’t forget the fire
or lose touch of fear
I’m the one you thought of
when your time comes near

Deception Looming

Every number has a meaning
words they drown and are deceiving
lost inside mouths that fear
that drink before they know it’s here
consume the air just to keep moving
growing in their deceptive grooming
every hair cut straight on head
every number a lie again
the words they hold so much yearning
burning ashes keep on churning
but nothing comes and nothing goes
everything drowns when it snows