Violent Manifestations

I’ve got a knife in my pocket
I want an excuse to draw it
to pull it from the pocket and draw blood
I just want something to do
something to make me use
the blade I carry round so casually
no one thinks it means a thing to me
like I’m just as fucking safe as I could be
but they don’t know how crazy really feeds
when normal stable people live to breed
vile and disgusting though it be
I’ve got a knife in my pocket
I want to see you bleed
violent misconception thought I’d see
no answer but the cut beneath the teeth
take it all by force so it might lead
to something so beyond what beauty means
a horrific violent drama tuned perfectly
hear the very screams that my knife brings
the pain the trauma the suffering
a display of pure affection for the need
the need to be a part of anything
moving through this life so carefully
I’ve got a knife in my pocket
I just need a reason to pull it
need to let it bleed
a violent effective remainder
of what the darkness needs

Unicorn whispers

Paper dolls and ribbons
never in between
girlhood always screaming
coming after me
with memories of innocence
or what it could have been
paper dolls and ribbons
lace dresses everywhere
growing up is difficult
with porcelain in the air
the unicorns are whispering
dancing on the fields
paper dolls and ribbons
burning in the reels
everybody watching
on the silver screen
the unicorns are whispering
and then the innocence leaves

Altogether

Breathing’s become quite laborious
hard on lungs unseen
beneath this flesh I’m dying slowly
covered with lost things
with withered dreams and gone ambition
I become nothing
breathing becomes difficult
when all you do is scream
screaming for a way out
one never to be found
with withered skin and hollowed eyes
you forget your screaming now
everything just feels like living
though you’re not alive
and when breathing becomes to much
you all together die

Sobering

I wanna get lost in the smoke
I wanna breath it in and devote
myself to the end
Finding meaning my friend
I wanna believe in something
only when I’m breathing something
I wanna get lost in the cloud
the smoke I know so well
and everything will be just fine
I wanna get high just to feel
like the world isn’t on fire
like we can achieve something higher
but then I wake up
and it’s still not enough to make me see
I just need this to believe
need this to be real
know that I can feel
I just wanna get lost in the smoke
fill my life with clouds and devote
myself to the end

Build

Building back some bridges
but only underneath
they aren’t for any real use
just plain old memory
building up those bridges
that we once burnt down
building up defenses
seems so silly now
as underneath it all
everything was there
all the pieces shattered
all in disrepair
all the rubble sitting
sitting in a void
building back some bridges
but only what’s been left
underneath the road
without much use I guess

From the dog

I don’t think so good
often misunderstood
liable and left wanting
I don’t know if this makes sense
burning questions ignorance
the wrist unveil what you wanted
a present wrapped in lust and need
a strong desire to be the lead
come up short or not at all
the real one knows you from the dog
I don’t think so good
often left misunderstood
liable my lips might be
burning in this mystery

The poison

Drink away the poison
in your bones is pain
living like a serpent
breathing in your veins
drink away the darkness
blow away your dreams
exhale just enough
not to make a scream
drink away the poison
for in your flesh there’s pain
break away from sorrow
remember your own name

The characters

The characters
they get real quiet
don’t know much
I’m undecided
can’t pick up the pen
I’m so divided
on what I should do
and what I want
wish I could
just blow it off
but the characters
they drive the plot
manipulate
through undo silence
threaten with
forgetful violence
the kind that kills
like an eraser
threatens to die
or forget the players
end the story
without an ending
they get real quiet
and they don’t grow
the story ends
without a show

Hard floors

Things will get uncomfortable
uncomfortable when you bleed
tell the world the whole truth
don’t leave anything to see
throw out all the garbage
throw out everything you need
things will get uncomfortable
when you go to sleep
dreams turn into nightmares
so quickly these days
dreams turn into rivers
the flow of collective dismay
things will get uncomfortable
uncomfortable when you eat
the food won’t be so filling
the drink won’t quench one’s thirst
but the source will keep on billing
billing until you burst
throw out every answer
make sure it’s read at least twice
throw out all that banter
the embarrassment of life
things will get uncomfortable
uncomfortable more and more
for life is all discomfort
especially while laying on hard floor

Looking back

I just wanna go back
always looking back
wanna go back
to when everything was better
it really wasn’t but
I just wanna go back
back to where it first began
before I made these mistakes
all the choices I could wait
wanna do it again
keep dreaming of then
even though at that time
I wanted to die
I just wanna go back
back in fucking time
I’m always looking back
looking back at what has been
wanna go back
I just wanna relive
every single mistake
every mishap every misstep
I just don’t want to think
think about growing old
I just wanna be young
pretend my life is like a movie
I just want to go back
back before I became
someone with responsibility
before I grew up
before I had to come to terms
be my age and learn
I just wanna go back
back before I thought about my life
and my death
when growing old felt like
a dream and then
all that ignorance
I just wanna go back