Forever awed

Didn’t care until I was gone
thought I’d be with you all along
like a dog without a say
like you’d just keep getting paid
didn’t care that I could’ve died
you just smiled that smile of lies
like you really gave a damn
thought you had me throat in hand
didn’t care until I walked away
thought you’d always have the right away
like I’d pay your bills straight from the grave
but you took too much and I left the bank
didn’t care until I was gone
thought I’d never turn it off
like I hadn’t once before
you thought me weak again for sure
didn’t care because I let you in
but now the house is all but burnt
you thought I would stay but I’ve learnt
it’s gone and everything’s empty
you try hard but never forget me
now I’m gone and you wish I wasn’t
but I ain’t here to pay off a little or nothing
for the debt you built so very high up
your pain my very new triumph
thought I’d stay out of obligation
but now my responsibilities ain’t weighted
didn’t care that I could’ve died
now I’m gone and you asking why
shut the door the banks all closed up
got nothing for the beggars and locusts
didn’t care until I was gone
so now you miss me forever in awe

Day by day

I’m not getting better
I just keep getting worse
here I am just tethered
to another verse
a song to sing so sweetly
that never goes away
it’s burrowed under skin
infected all my brain
I can’t keep from drowning
in the open air
I can’t keep from dying
I’m pulling out my hair
as everybody watches
enjoys the slow decay
I’m not getting better
just living day by day

Clean drinking water

Words trickle down my finger tips
drinking up the water it’s a sin
screams that often grow there are within
words just trickle right out of the skin
flesh not the best method to keep them in
words they trickle down and then within
drinking of its water now that’s a sin
repeating all the lies that grow within
words trickle down to feet and now begin
out of lips they sin no longer drinking anything
words trickle from the lips as water washes everything
words trickle down my finger tips
drinking of it’s water now that’s a sin
words trickle out of lips then back again
screams that often grow there are within
water washes everything from lips that drink the sin clean

Pretty lame

I’ve been pathetic
been down right rude
I’m somebody’s broken heart
bet you are too
been the crazy ex girlfriend
and the girl you didn’t label
been everybody’s friend
wound up alone later
I’ve been desperate
and a tool
made mistakes
and really bad choices
everybody’s stories
not exactly the same
but if you think you were cool
you were probably pretty lame

While it’s well

Take a step back
see where you at
move, move, move like the plague
everybody wants to be
fun, so wild and so free
everybody wants to be blameless
but we don’t know exactly how to
take it
see where you are bleeding
bandage up that heart
take a moment from me
pretend it isn’t art
and bleed out of the eyes
like a vision caught in hell
take a step back honey
and kill it while it’s well


Take the stars and moon away
the sky doesn’t need them anyway
take the air and the sun
take the clouds and oceans up
steal the trees and cut them down
we don’t need them without sound
take the senses one by one
drink the poison kill the throat
take the sky and ground below
burn the memories and old photos
take the things we no longer need
why have air if you can’t breathe?

Never meant

Set it up and watch me burn
take the lessons you didn’t learn
pretend the words I said are dead
you didn’t hear them the letter unread
set it up just to take me out
forget my name and let me down
remember the words you wanted to hear
I never did speak them just pretend dear
set it up and bind me twice
burn my flesh and soothe with ice
just so you can beat me again
forget the things you never meant

Spinning in

Spinning in the aftermath
drinking in the sin and ash
all that ever comes to pass
will leave you rotting in the mass
the pile that’s been left behind
of flesh removed and cyanide
lips that fall on broken skin
feel the blood drink it in
feel it on your teeth and tongue
spinning in ashes and sin for fun
death will come when you sleep
rip out your gums
and keep the meat
spinning in life moments weep

Hard work

They say they work hard
and maybe they do
but do you believe
you owe them to
like you paid in advance
and after the meal
didn’t get a whole plate
but you paid for the feels
they say they work hard
and maybe they do
but if you pay double
what is the truth
do they deserve more
or are you a fool
pay for the performance
but they don’t perform for you
stifled creativity sorry ass excuses
is this entertainment
or a house of useless muses

Take me back

Take me back to that time again
the time when it wasn’t decadence
dressed in trash and laced with sin
dancing in the straight ignorance
take me back to a time before
before we all fell on the floor
too drunk to pray and too damn bored
drunk off what we lost once more
gave it up like we knew better
drift like stars in darkness forever
take me back where I can see the sun
I don’t like this I want where I come from
take me back to a place like home
a time when all that glitters ain’t gold
where darkness is because of light
where angels sing instead of fight
take me back before we fell
a place that doesn’t feel like hell